THE BIG WRAP PARTY TONIGHT (Episode H5)
Music by Richard Stone. Lyrics by Tom Ruegger.
Yakko: Come in, be a smarty
The shindig's 'bout to starty
Wakko: The gang's all here
Dot : Let's give a cheer
YW+D : For the big wrap party tonight
Wakko: There's chow galore
Dot : So open the door
YW+D : To the big wrap party tonight
Yakko: We're dining buffet style
With food from every nation
So plan to stop a while
And join the celebration
Wakko: They've come for fun and feastin'
Dot : We've even let the Beast in
YW+D : Let's go hors d'oeuvre-in'
And see what they're servin'
At the big wrap party tonight
YW+D : There's manicotti for Dotty
Soft shell taco for Yakko
And Wakko is ready
For a truck load of spaghetti
At the big wrap party tonight
Hello Nurse is eating liverwurst
Thaddeus Plotz has red hots
Ralph the Guard is cooking with lard
The apron that's cute is Dot's
Wakko: Take a whiff, Dr. Scratchansniff
Dot : No veal in the meal for Miss Flamiel
YW+D : The Flame keeps a-glowin'
The punch bowl's overflowin'
At the big wrap party tonight
The Randy Beaman kid
Is eatin' fried squid
At the big wrap party tonight
Wakko: The pasta by Pesto is the besto
Dot : Bobby helps Squit, who's choking on a pit
Yakko: The cheese balls are nectar
To Mr. Director
YW+D : At the big wrap party tonight
The great Wakkorotti
Has gone to the potty
At the big wrap party tonight
Yakko: Runt bakes the bundt cakes
Dot : A pocket of pita for Rita
YW+D : Nuttin' but mutton
For Mindy and Buttons
Sylvester wants a parakeet-ah
Yakko: Katie Ka-Boom can clear out a room
Wakko: A pie, key lime
Dot : Is headed for the mime
YW+D : Chicken Boo
Is eating tiramisu
At the big wrap party tonight
The entire crew
Came from Acme Loo
For the big wrap party tonight
YW+D : Get another nappy for Slappy
More bean dippy for Skippy
Extra chippos for the Hip Hippos
The Brain's eating pizza that's drippy
Minerva's leavin' with Steven
A hot cocoa drinky for Pinky
Yakko and Wakko
Don't allow tobacco
At the big wrap party tonight
It's happy hour
In the water tower
At the big wrap party tonight
YW+D : In our 'toon careers
These are the golden years
We've loved the jokes
So thank you folks
You've eaten your fill
Now here's the bill
For the big wrap party
Yakko: Pay with your credit cardy
YW+D : At the big wrap party tonight
The big wrap party tonight
Transcribed by Steve Kramer
Lyrics from ONE FLEW OVER THE CUCKOO CLOCK (Episode
83)
by Nicholas Hollander, Jeff Kwitny and Tom Ruegger
Rocket Rat (parody of Mighty Mouse)
Chorus: Mister Annoying never makes a sound
When Rocket Rat flies into town
Rocket: Here I come to rescue you...
Chorus: Rocket Rat, your rodent true blue.
Rocket: (spoken) But first, a nap.
Lyrics from CUTIE AND THE BEAST (Episode 84)
by Kevin Hopps
Cutie and the Beast (parody of Beauty and the Beast)
Singers: Certain is what we are
Of what you like the least
Snails on your lawn
Songs that go on and on
Cutie and the Beast
Snails on your lawn
Songs that go on and on
Cutie and the Beast.
---
Dot (parody of Belle)
Belle : Charming places
With quaint singing faces
(bump!)
Dot : Singing tunes that you've heard before!
Every one a bigger bore
Townsfolk : People like you and me
Yakko : All singing way off key
Dot : Look at me
I'm in a musical
Look at me
I sing confusical
Blacksmith: She says she's singing; how can you tell?
Appleman : It's like a funny smell
Dot : You're just jealous 'cause I sing so well!
La la la la la la la.
Washwoman : The lyrics couldn't get much worse
Y+W : Helloooo, nurse!
Blacksmith: This endless song makes me want to curse -- OW!
Yakko : Now you move to the next verse!
Dot : Have some pie
Wakko : I'll try it
Mother : Why oh why
Can't she just be quiet?
Dot : La la la la la la la la--
Baby : Wah!
Hunter : She's causing such a din
YW+Dog : Arooooo!
Hunter : I can't tell what key she's in
AllFolks : But she really is a funny girl
A cutie, but a funny girl
She really sings a lot
Dot : La laaaa--
AllFolks : That's Dot!
Now get on with the plot!
---
Be a Pest (parody of Be Our Guest)
Yakko: You know, if she keeps on being pushy
She'll be thrown out on her tushie
Wakko: All she needs is his affection
Yakko: What he needs is police protection.
For a beast, he is the very, very best
Y+W : But she's a pest, she's a pest, she's a pest!
(Taz throws them out)
Taz : And don't come back!
(but they do)
Yakko: While she may have been forward
Wakko: Acting out of her gourd
Yakko: We simply must insist
You did more than just resist
Wakko: You threw her out!
Yakko: What a lout!
Dot : To say the least
You were a beast!
Wakko: How you acted was a crime
Now I'm afraid...
Y+W : ...it's payback time.
Yakko: We will slide
Wakko: We will hide
Yakko: We'll do things you can't abide
Wakko: And we'll do all kinds of tricks
Just for kicks.
Yakko: Your troubles we're enjoying
Wakko: And we're so annoying
Y+W : We are pests, we are pests, we are pests!
(Dot takes the magic flower)
Dot : He loves me. He loves me not. He loves me. He loves me n--.
(Taz takes it)
Taz : Put that away!
(Taz throws them out)
Taz : Now go, go, go!
Yakko: If your host throws you out
There's no need for you to pout
And should they change all the locks
Just come back with a big gift box.
(BOOM!)
Yakko: (spoken) Uhhh, you're Taz, aren't you.
Taz : Uh, me no Taz!
Wakko: Could you do that thing -- that funny thing that you do?
Taz : Waulgh!
Wakko: No, that's not it!
Taz : Umm... Waigh ih ih ih ih!
Yakko: Nah, that's not it either. Y'know -- the funny thing!
Dot : Can we finish this cartoon??
Yakko: All right...
YW+D : (sung) We are pests, we are pests, we are pests!
Yakko: As you can surely tell
Wakko: It's a job that we do well
Yakko: So should you be at someone's house
When they're acting like a louse
Wakko: Be like us
Make a fuss
Y+W : And be a pest, be a pest, be a pest!
Yakko: Grab your host, give a squeeze
Maybe somewhere 'round the knees
Wakko: You're his guest; cheer him up!
(Taz: Ugh...)
Yakko: No, no, please don't interrupt
Tweak a nose, pull some ears
Swing him from the chandeliers
Wakko: Watch him go to and fro
Yakko: Ah, see, now you're a pro.
Yes, you deserve a great big hand
Because now you know you can
Y+W : Be a pest, be a pest, be a pest!
Thanks to Tom Ruegger for his assistance
NOEL (Episode 84)
Music traditional (The First Noël). Lyrics by
Randy Rogel.
Yakko: What are you doing, Wakko?
Wakko: I'm writing a letter a Santa, telling him what I want
for Christmas.
Yakko: Wait a minute -- hold the phone! That's not how you
spell `Santa'.
Wakko: It isn't?
Yakko: No; you've got it all wrong.
Wakko: Well, how do you spell it, then?
Yakko: To spell Santa's name
Is easy to do
You write S, A, N, T
And another A, too.
But no L, no L
Santa's name has no L
And he won't be too pleased
If you don't learn to spell.
Wakko: Jack and Jill went up the hill
To fetch water from a well
But when neither one could find it
Jill started to yell.
Dot : No well, no well
Can't believe there's no well!
We walked all the way here
And I'm mad, can't you tell.
Yakko: Captain Ahab took his crew
His harpoon and set sail
And he called out to ships
Ahab : Have you seen the white whale?
Crew : No whale, no whale
No, we ain't seen no whale
Man 1: Saw a couple of dolphins
Man 2: And a big yellowtail.
YW+D : If you've listened to this tune
Then you probably can tell
That you've heard it before
It's a song you know well.
Know well, know well
It's a song you know well
And we've ruined it completely
So we all say, "Oh well."
Oh well, oh well
We'll just say, "Fare thee well"
Merry Christmas to you
And a joyous Noël.
Lyrics from JOKAHONTAS (Episode 85)
by Earl Kress
Indian Chant (parody of Steady as the Beating Drum)
Singers: Hey-ya, three four
Who is it that we're for?
Hey-ya, three four
Who do we all cheer for?
From his tipi he will come
Chief Yakhatan, proud and strong
From the hunt brave Wakko-Um
Will return before too long.
Hey-ya, three four
Is Wakko-Um a warrior?
Hey-ya, five six
Or is he up to his old tricks?
---
Just the Same Old Heroine (parody of Just Around the Riverbend)
Pocadotas: Father, I can't get married now!
There's a great big crazy world out there,
and I have a feeling there's something better for me!
Yakhatan : Say, this plot is beginning to sound familiar...
Y+W : You feel like this is déjà vu
A girl who thinks that she wants more
The music starts; you find that you are humming.
It's OK, then it dawns on you
You've seen this story before
Now you're stuck, and you know what is coming.
Just the same old heroine
Just a re-run heroine
You've seen before
Dot : First I tuned an aerial
Y+W : Again once more
Dot : Then I rang a bell
Y+W : This music score
YW+D : The Schloscar it will win
With the same old heroine.
It worked once; why not again?
YW+D : We have got your seven bucks
Why should we try something new?
We know you'll buy the video
Your money, we will rake it in.
Dot : Our formula
That's called entertainment
YW+D : Just a retread heroine!
---
John Smith and Company (parody of The Virginia Company)
Smith: Men, we're after something better than gold --
something...wonderful!
Smith: We're sailing to the New World
Rough seas don't worry me
We'll make the trip with ease
For it's John Smith and company!
We'll raise up the flag unfurled
For the treasures that we'll see
We'll take whate'er we please
'Cause we're John Smith and company!
SB+J : Take whate'er we please
'Cause we're John Smith and company!
---
Ice Cream Song (sung to Hungarian Rhapsody No. 2 by Franz Liszt)
YW+D : Vanilla, chocolate, strawberry
Mint, rocky road and some bing cherry
Chocolate chip and bubble gum
In cup or cone,
Jerome : Hey, I'll take some!
YW+D : French vanilla, mocha coffee
Butter pecan, English toffee
Walnut, peanut butter cup
Orange sherbet,
Wakko : Fill me up!
YW+D : Sundaes
We make on Mondays
With butterscotch, whipped cream and cherry
Yakko : Not so fast! Whoa! What's your hurry?
YW+D : Toppings
Pile on the toppings
With gumdrops, cookies and a jimmy
Jerome : I want it!
Benjamin: Please gimme gimme!
* Smith : (spoken) There's no song like this in the movie.
* Yakko : I know, but we got hungry.
* Smith : Double dip for me -- strawberry.
YW+D : Marble fudge and cappucino
Cream and cookies,
Wakko : That one's keen-o!
YW+D : Cheesecake, neapolitan
Benjamin: You can't have it!
Jerome : Yes I can!
YW+D : Now we've sung you every flavor
Which one would you like to savor?
One more thing to set its fame
We forgot to tell its name.
So we scream: "It's ice cream!"
* - In the original script, these lines were:
Smith: (spoken) There's no song like this in the movie.
Yakko: I know. This song is good!
Smith: Point well taken. Carry on.
Lyrics provided by the author